Tuesday, July 21, 2009


I am trying to say/type that word 100 times in 7 days. I think I'm getting close. Many of you have asked if I have found out anything yet. hahahaha. Are you joking? I hurried to the doctor, waited over an hour for my 15 minutes with Dr. Concerned (NOT). He sent me to a lab 2 miles down the road for blood work and to another location another 5 miles down the road for an x-ray. Then to the pharmacist with 2 prescriptions to be filled.....dropped off and picked up later of course. All in all, my whole day was pretty much consumed last Thursday with getting a diagnosis/treatment. By the time I got home, I was in alot of pain and exhausted from the heat. Waaaawaaaawaaa.

(To all the soldiers in Iraq....if by some fat chance you would stumble on here and read this....I am so sorry. Please forgive me. I would gladly relive every day like Thursday for you to be able to come home and live a peaceful life in the US in air conditioning....but allow me to finish the waaaawaaa...it will only take a few more minutes.)

By Friday, my stomach was torn up from the meds so I got on the internet and looked up home remedies....natural cures and such. I was not only in pain with my toe, but now nauseated and having sharp, doubling over pains in my intestines. Dr. Concerned (NOT) had warned me about this but I thought how bad could it be? It was bad. I was desperate. I found one website that promised a 2 hour cure. I only had to pay $19.95 for this 48 page booklet about Gout. All About Gout. Bought it, printed it out. Are you ready for the 2 hour cure?

It said to mix 1/2 teaspoon of baking soda in 8 oz. of water, stir to dissolve, then drink it up. Do this upon onset of symptoms. Then before bedtime and when waking then every 4 hours if needed.....but not to exceed 4 teaspoons in a day. Are you ready for this?

I drank one glass in the late afternoon and another before bedtime. I am not kidding you....during the night I realized the pain was gone. I could bend my toe and it only hurt a little when I walked. The swelling and redness was still there, but the pain had almost all gone away.

Believe it not.

Now, I feel like I have to tell you this part. I got on the internet again on Saturday....and one website warned about taking baking soda...especially if you have high blood pressure. It is very high in sodium. Warning!!! Well, I only took in 1 teaspoon in all and it worked. And I'm still here. So I only know it worked for me.

Or it could have been the 8 servings of cherry cobbler. Or the 2 doses of that horrible medicine that tore my insides up.

I am much better. And still waiting for the test results. I waited patiently until Monday. But when they didn't call me, I called them today. Of course, I got a recording for the person they transferred me to...and I am waiting for her to call me back. But I can guaran-damn-tee you she will tell me I have to come in for the results.

Thanks for asking about me...I'll let you know.

PS....I just gotta tell you this...when I was at the lab last Thursday, they needed a urine specimen. With no instructions where to leave the full cup, I just set it on the counter on a paper towel (lid was on and my name was on the label in case you're wondering). I returned to the waiting room and went up to ask the very, very, very busy receptionist....no one was in line, I am standing at the window, but she couldn't look up so I am guessing she was very, very, very busy...where to put the jar. Finally, she looks up, I ask if I should just leave the specimen in the restroom. She says yes. I ask this because there are only 2 lab workers....the receptionist and one I passed by taking some one's blood. And neither of them was guiding me through this process.

Next, they call a young guy to the back and hand him the same type of cup. They tell him to wash his hands first. He says first? They say yes. I am guessing because his germy hands have to touch the thing where the urine comes out??? Anyway he heads into the restroom where my cup is still sitting on the counter. I had overheard him tell another guy that he was there for a drug screening because he was interviewing for a job at a car place.....going to work on cars. If I had had 10 more minutes I would have been able to tell you his life story but like I said, he got called back.

Now, because I watch way too much tv, I think.......what if he switches our urine because he is here for a drug test and he takes mine and I get his and the doctor thinks I'm on drugs? This all whips through my brain in 2 seconds....so I basically yell out to the receptionist.....Wait! Is my cup still in there?

She looks at me with a bothered look and says no. Okay. Good.

I have to ask you....am I the only one who thinks like this?


  1. omgosh you make me laugh laugh laugh!! Let me clarify - with you now, not at you, with you... :)

    as for the pee swap, one never knows, stranger things have happened, so it's good you were on top of things!


  2. Haha Julia, I would have done the same in the pee scenario.

  3. Oh Yeah Julia, you are definately the only person who would think of this stuff hahahaha. Do you read Nora Ephron? Did you read her book about her neck? can't remember the real title. You should be rich. Write a book...do you hear me?